Dear my wavering heart,

Dear my wavering heart, 
The world is full of hatred.
So you mustn't let go of the resolve
but why do you cry with such uncertainty? 

All your memories are filled with happiness
And there you are replaying that song.
What has become of your perseverance? 
What has become of your love? 

Dear my gentle tears,

Dear my gentle tears,
I was hoping you wouldn't be here.
How long has it been since you came?
I wonder why I wanted to see you.

I remember that day you courageously fell
The air was frigid but my heart was too heavy to carry anymore
But you helped me see the red light and I stopped 
I did not dare to take another step

I

     "And then he laughed!" she said. 

     "Can you believe him? I fell and the first thing he did was laugh! He's really heartless right?" 

Her voice seemed to echo through the frigid air. The wet dirt was beginning to bother her but she didn't want to leave yet. She wasn't ready to go. 

     "But then, he reached his hand out to me...and he asked if I was okay with a dumb smile on his face..." 

She wanted to tell him she reached for that hand. She wanted to tell him that it was a lot rougher than she imagined it to be, but it was warm. She couldn't bring herself to tell him she reach for that hand just like she reached for his. 

     "And then we just stood there waiting for Ann. You know how she is, late as always. She never changes. But...at least there's one thing we can count on staying the same." 

She remembered she brought gloves but she didn't want to wear them. The stone was cold too. She started to get angry because she couldn't feel its ridges.

     "But then she didn't show up. That Ann...something about her brother moving. I couldn't really hear what she said. You know how my phone is." 

She took out her phone to show him. Cracked screen, broken camera, and everything. He would surely tell her to get a new phone. 

And she replied with the same hesitation, "Yea, I should..." 

     "So, we just, you know, walked around I guess...and got some food. He made me wait for him while he went for the bathroom. So, I just sat there watching the people skate at the park. We, never really got to do that huh." 

Snow had started to fall. The sun was setting. Her tears made her face red and unbearably cold. 

     "And then, he came back. You know, from the bathroom." she hesitated, "with flowers. for me..." 

- 

"I love you. I always had. I know I will never be able to take his place, I know I will never be able to be your number one. But, I want to be by your side. I want to protect you in his stead. I want you to cry in my arms as you think about him. I want to give you the happiness you deserve. Will you give me a chance?" 

- 

She started to bawl. Her ugly cry resonated throughout the field. Her glasses were falling off and fogging up. She just cried even more. 

     "It's all your fault! You! I told you I wanted flowers but you never got them for me!" she started to yell at him as she trembled from the cold and the pain. 

     "Yes! I said yes okay?! Because HE bought me flowers. HE went ice skating with me. HE stayed with me and HE didn't leave me. He didn't leave me...He didn't leave me like you did." 

But he didn't say anything. He didn't feel anything. He couldn't embrace her like he always did. But she was sure he would've wanted to. She was sure he would've. 

Gripping the grass with all the strength she had left, she bawled. Her scarf, wet with her tears, provided no warmth. The wool hat he gave her provided no comfort. The earrings she received from him on their 3rd anniversary provided no love. All she could do was continue to cry.

Moana

Moana is such an amazing movie ! Music, animation, story, characters, voice actors, plot, scenary, cultural accuracy (from what I've been reading), color palette and everything !

If you'd like, please support the wonderful movie and go see it ~ (◕‿◕)

Autumn Company

Natsume Yuujinchou is back and now I've got something wonderful to look forward to every Tuesday.

先週は書道の授業があった。石の上に「道」を書いたので、ちょっと俳句を作った。
私にとって　未来の道が知らないときは怖くても、それも一番楽しいことね。
毎日の質問は　私ができるかな。

もし文法は違ったら、教えてください～

道の花    未来を咲くが   見つけるな